[ well!! he's not!!! he sure is not!!! he jitters for a second like he's trying to decide something, just, angry, and then jerks his head and shoves his hands in his pockets, hard. ]
I'm not. I'm so - I fucking hate this place so much. I'm not even - I don't even know how to be calm, but I don't want to flip my shit on someone who doesn't deserve it, I fucking yelled at Annie, earlier, and I can't -
[ he cuts himself off, after a second, takes another deep breath. his emotions just radiate with that anger, as it flares violently with his sentence. ] I'm so fucking tired of watching people die, Kainé.
[ Her worry and concern ripple across her own anger, and there is a flicker of uncertainty before she closes some distance between them. She doesn't reach out physically, but it feels like she wants to. ]
I know. I'm goddamn tired of it, too.
[ The pain and suffering everyone has this weekend is immense. ]
And I can't even say that we won't be getting more tired. It hurts being helpless, and it just hurts in general.
[ he looks at her - and for a second, just looks like a caged animal. just, angry and miserable and blatantly so, vulnerable and written all over his face. it's just a wave of grief when she comes closer, too, laced tight with all of that fury.
his voice quiets. ]
We couldn't have saved her. I don't think there was a damn thing we could've done.
[ he'll let kainé take his hand, no problem. his fingers are kind of cold - the stress and the anger has definitely taken its toll, from the past few hours. still, he glances at her when she finishes up, and the corner of his mouth lifts up, just a little. ]
A lot more walls to break. [ it feels a little harder to hold onto that than it used to, right now, but ichiro's never been one to let sadness keep him down for long. there's the the hope that they'll get this shit figured out. ]
We gotta get the dead back - as soon as we can. And figure out what the fuck's trapping people into doing that, too. Just a million more stupid fucking problems for this stupid fucking place.
[ Even if they still don't know how to break down the walls yet, at least there's more of an idea of what kind of walls there are, as horrific as they are. ]
What Otome said was—
[ Alarming. Before all hell broke loose and even more tragedy descended on all of them. How much of that was true or what she was made to believe is something Kainé doesn't know, but...
Even if her hope is small and likely to wink out any moment, it's still there, and she'll cling onto it. ]
We'll tackle all of that, yeah? Because we can't stop. We'll get more info and keep moving until this can't even be called a stupid fucking place anymore.
[ She squeezes his hand, as almost as a kind of a promise but also to validate all his feelings because she doesn't think it's wrong for him to be angry or miserable or to feel as much grief as he does. It's what makes him him, and she wouldn't be able to be as she is now without his previous support. ]
[ alarming, yeah. and strong enough that it warranted immediate retribution - which means it likely had to be true. a terrifying thought.
he feels that hope, though. sharing emotions this week has been pretty shitty, for the most part, but that tiny flicker of kainé's hope means something to him, and obviously so. ichiro looks at her for a long moment, and then takes a deep breath, lifting his other arm to scrub it briefly across his face. get it together. ]
Yeah. [ people are counting on him. this - this whole place, they all have to lean on each other even more than ever, if they want to make it out of here alive, if they want to smash down this place like he promised what feels like years ago. get it together. ]
...yeah. [ this one's sturdier, now. he lifts his head up and lets some of that whirling, angry maelstrom of emotions come down. ] ...thanks, Kainé.
[ it's a very heartfelt thank you; he needed to hear that, and kainé being the one to deliver it is what is making the talk stick. he's not blind to the gravity of it, at all. ]
[ She doesn't know how to respond to thanks like that, not really, but it's enough that her ever present anger subsides, and he can feel the genuine fondness and care that she holds for him. He's done so much to try to make her feel welcome and accepted when she's so used to the opposite that there are some things that grow true in her heart.
All it takes is kindness to bloom a little hope.
Her anger and violet tendencies aren't lies and aren't jokes, but what moves her at the end of the day is the people she comes to care about.
Her small smile is fleeting. ]
You've given me a lot. [ More than she deserves. ]
I'll just punch you next time.
[ She can only be outwardly kind for five seconds. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
I'm not. I'm so - I fucking hate this place so much. I'm not even - I don't even know how to be calm, but I don't want to flip my shit on someone who doesn't deserve it, I fucking yelled at Annie, earlier, and I can't -
[ he cuts himself off, after a second, takes another deep breath. his emotions just radiate with that anger, as it flares violently with his sentence. ] I'm so fucking tired of watching people die, Kainé.
no subject
[ Her worry and concern ripple across her own anger, and there is a flicker of uncertainty before she closes some distance between them. She doesn't reach out physically, but it feels like she wants to. ]
I know. I'm goddamn tired of it, too.
[ The pain and suffering everyone has this weekend is immense. ]
And I can't even say that we won't be getting more tired. It hurts being helpless, and it just hurts in general.
no subject
his voice quiets. ]
We couldn't have saved her. I don't think there was a damn thing we could've done.
[ and that's the worst part. ]
no subject
It fucking sucks beyond anything. [ There really are no words profane enough to articulate it. ]
The things we can't do. Finding out the truth also fucking sucks. [ The truth today hurt so many people. Emotionshare isn't needed to see it. ]
But that just means we have that much more hurt to return tenfold.
[ Someway, somehow. ]
no subject
A lot more walls to break. [ it feels a little harder to hold onto that than it used to, right now, but ichiro's never been one to let sadness keep him down for long. there's the the hope that they'll get this shit figured out. ]
We gotta get the dead back - as soon as we can. And figure out what the fuck's trapping people into doing that, too. Just a million more stupid fucking problems for this stupid fucking place.
no subject
[ Even if they still don't know how to break down the walls yet, at least there's more of an idea of what kind of walls there are, as horrific as they are. ]
What Otome said was—
[ Alarming. Before all hell broke loose and even more tragedy descended on all of them. How much of that was true or what she was made to believe is something Kainé doesn't know, but...
Even if her hope is small and likely to wink out any moment, it's still there, and she'll cling onto it. ]
We'll tackle all of that, yeah? Because we can't stop. We'll get more info and keep moving until this can't even be called a stupid fucking place anymore.
[ She squeezes his hand, as almost as a kind of a promise but also to validate all his feelings because she doesn't think it's wrong for him to be angry or miserable or to feel as much grief as he does. It's what makes him him, and she wouldn't be able to be as she is now without his previous support. ]
no subject
he feels that hope, though. sharing emotions this week has been pretty shitty, for the most part, but that tiny flicker of kainé's hope means something to him, and obviously so. ichiro looks at her for a long moment, and then takes a deep breath, lifting his other arm to scrub it briefly across his face. get it together. ]
Yeah. [ people are counting on him. this - this whole place, they all have to lean on each other even more than ever, if they want to make it out of here alive, if they want to smash down this place like he promised what feels like years ago. get it together. ]
...yeah. [ this one's sturdier, now. he lifts his head up and lets some of that whirling, angry maelstrom of emotions come down. ] ...thanks, Kainé.
[ it's a very heartfelt thank you; he needed to hear that, and kainé being the one to deliver it is what is making the talk stick. he's not blind to the gravity of it, at all. ]
no subject
All it takes is kindness to bloom a little hope.
Her anger and violet tendencies aren't lies and aren't jokes, but what moves her at the end of the day is the people she comes to care about.
Her small smile is fleeting. ]
You've given me a lot. [ More than she deserves. ]
I'll just punch you next time.
[ She can only be outwardly kind for five seconds. ]