pc catchall | seasonality | hope

[steelo]

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w0 post trial

[steelo]

[ it takes a little while for ichiro to get moving as the gymnasium starts to clear out, because he's still sitting on the floor with hope. it's only when the number of people starts to fade out that he's ready to start moving - he starts to coax hope up to his feet, then hooks an arm around his shoulders and starts to hustle him out of the gym and out into the night.

not straight back to the dorms, though. instead, it's just out to the main path on campus - the night is dark and quiet and a little chilly, bracingly so, and it seems like some fresh air is at least a start into getting hope back into a headspace that looks less like his brain has reached full shutdown mode.

the arm stays for now - steadying, more than anything. ichiro's not quite fussy, but he's definitely worried, and feeling a whole host of emotions of his own on the evening that passed, but they're buried for now under the need to be a caretaker, to look out for someone else in need.

when they reach a long enough walk away down the path, he finally speaks up - ] Talk to me. [ or shout at him, yell at him, whatever. just get it off your chest; he can practically see the trauma on hope's face. ]

[selfestheim]

[ hope moves very mechanically, only budging whenever ichiro guides or nudges him. though his eyes are pointed at the ground most of the time, they're not even really fully focused—he's a little too shell-shocked by the events of today to do much else when accompanied by someone, let alone by himself.

he hadn't even see what kaoruko had looked like once the clock had struck 9, but the complete lack of anything from her as her guilt was confirmed shook him. what actually happened on thursday night? was it an accident, or was it intentional? did she even feel any kind of remorse for what happened to hiyori?

what sort of wish did she have that could have possibly justified taking another's life?

it's only when ichiro directly addresses him that hope stirs in some form. his eyes are still glassy, and he's not quite looking at ichiro when he responds. in a similar vein, it takes him a while to find the energy to muster up a reply. when he finally does, his voice is hoarse and maybe even a little hollow, like his mouth has gone completely dry. ]

What...what the hell did we do?

[steelo]

[ it hurts ichiro to see his face like that - stirs up a maelstrom of emotions. worry and concern for hope, who is just a kid, angry that they've been trapped in whatever the hell this situation is, angry for the lack of answers. it's the kind of anger that sits in your chest and gnaws at your ribcage, the kind that sinks into your bones desperate for an outlet, the kind ichiro's known since he was a kid himself. it flickers across his stop and go eyes as hope looks up at him, but he pulls it back.

he can't put that on hope. ichiro's expression is grim, brows furrowed, mouth pulled into a line, and he looks away from him for a long moment, back at the school itself. ]

... Made a choice. [ his voice is low and gravelly with it, as he shoves his hands in his pockets. ] A shitty one. [ not as shitty as whatever kaoruko did. she seemed like a sweet girl - ichiro's dormmate, even. ]

Not like that bear gave us much choice for doing it. [ both that they had to vote, and that someone would be picked at random if they didn't. the way the stupid fucking principal kept saying - we weren't ready for this, this doesn't happen? felt like bullshit. ichiro feels it in his bones, a deep seated mistrust; he's got a thousand questions of his own, and not a single one of them was answered. ]

( week 1 ) thursday

[selfestheim]

Hey, Ichiro.

It's not weird that I want to check in with you today after what happened last week, right?

[steelo]

definitely not weird. i was gonna check up with you, too.
how're you feeling?

[selfestheim]

Anxious

week 2 weds before the mini event!!

[steelo]

hey, man
think we might've found an explanation for that weird marquee in the cafeteria
you're gonna think im nuts but i wanted to pass it on

[selfestheim]

You guys got the stuff about the script, too?

[steelo]

yeah.
what was yours about? were they the same, do you know?
ours was 3 pages and had some editorial notes.

( week 2 ) friday

[selfestheim]

[ almost immediately after the body announcement goes out, ichiro will be getting a text! ]

Were you able to check anything out today?

[steelo]

Yeah. Fields, mostly.
Something fucked up the dugout in the baseball diamond, and we found blood. net to the soccer field was slashed up, too.
i've been checkin in with the others too, tryin to get a good idea of what everybody found.

how're you doing?

I NEVER HIT POST COMMENT

[selfestheim]

I'm fine. I wanted to go out and help, but I knew if anyone saw me wandering around outside, I'd get another lecture or five.

Frumpkin and Kissa make for some pretty good company when no one else is around.

( week 3 ) tuesday

[selfestheim]

[ hewwo ichiro! wherever he happens to be this morning, hope will be strolling on up to him! ... well, he'll be hobbling over, yes, but at least he has a crutch now to make things slightly easier for himself! look how happy he is! (it's about the same amount as usual, but, you know.) ]

So... I might have gotten some vouchers over the last few days.

[steelo]

[ me like trying to do any tags besides anime night finally

i mean!!! when hope hobbles over ichiro grins at him!! he recognizes the happy! ] Oh yeah? Did you get your magic?

[selfestheim]

Yeah. I was...busy last week. [ yea that's what we'll call it, ] I got a ton of vouchers on Sunday, so I turned them in for a spell I can use once a week. So...hopefully I'll be able to get some use out of it.

( week 3 ) sunday

[selfestheim]

[ this weekend has been! a lot!! and hope looks tired as hell, but here he is with two to-go cups of hot chocolate, one of which he offers to ichiro somewhat sheepishly. ]

...Thanks for helping me keep my head cool yesterday.

[steelo]

[ oh!!!! spotting hope, ichiro gives him a smile. he looks tired, too, though slightly more well rested than he did on saturday, and he takes the cup carefully with his non dominant hand, then gestures at where he's sitting. come join him! he's got a book open and it looks like its about horseback riding. idk man. ]

Hey, no sweat. Believe it or not, I'm used to that. [ breaking up baby fights is like his actual job. ] Besides, tension was high, dude - no one can blame you for that.

w4 thursday

[steelo]

hey man
quick q. are you planning on doing anything with the blind auctions?

[selfestheim]

[ the ... bubble sticks around for like twenty seconds ]

No one actually bid on me, so I guess I'm free.

[ wrong auction, ]

( week 5 ) thursday, immediately after cyoa return

[selfestheim]

[ when ichiro lifts his arm and touches his face, hope's eyes start to water before he squeezes them shut so he can concentrate. with one hand still focused on channeling his magic to heal and mend the older boy's broken body, he reaches up with his free one to grasp the hand ichiro has on his face, pushing the palm into his cheek. being this close, it's easy to tell that even though he's terrified from the way his entire body shakes, his resolve is absolute; he's putting everything he has into making sure ichiro will be okay. ]

Stop, don't talk– s-save your energy until I'm done, okay? I...I talked to Annie earlier, I should be able to heal you more than I was before.

[steelo]

[ of course it's steady. he'd expect nothing else - hope is a great kid, and ichiro has always had faith in him. even if he's scared, he wants to try and reassure that the best he can, wants to support that resolve. wants to keep hope from looking that terrified.

he smiles, a little. eyes half closed, bloodied, but alive, as the warmth of the healing magic courses through him. it reminds him of home, for a second.

ichiro's not supposed to talk, so he just nods, a little bit, the best that he can, and presses his palm a little more into his cheek. sorry about your bloody handprint on your face bud, but he's trying his best to show some solidarity - i'm here. he's strong. he won't die so easily. ] Mmhm.

[ an mmhm instead of words -a yes, okay. i trust you. thank you. all at once. ]

( week 6 ) saturday

[selfestheim]

[ about an hour after trial ends: ]

Hey.
Where are you right now?

[steelo]

it's a bad idea, hope

( week 6 ) sunday

[selfestheim]

[ the others can have their expositions, he can see the dead later—

hope just chases after ichiro when he sees the older boy take off. ]

Hey—

[steelo]

[ haha well

its hope, so he at least. stops. he doesn't turn around to look at him, just clenches his fist tight at his side. the word comes out sharper than he intends it to - ]

- What? [ and then, he immediately just thinks - Sorry. I'm sorry. ]